What Color is Your Smart Phone?

Electronic devices have changed a lot in just a few years.  Smart phones with touch screens abound, and rare is the person who has a mobile phone that functions primarily as a phone/awkward texting device.  Netbooks almost got a foothold, but the launch of the iPad two years ago introduced the tablet revolution.  E-readers were a novelty three years ago, and now, in many households, there are multiple e-readers. There is plenty to talk about regarding these devices and the evolving technology and media millieu.  Think for a moment about what electronics were in your life four years ago and what you have now.

As a Waldorf elementary and middle school, BWS does not have computers for student use.  We have media guidelines, and cell phone policies, and preferences, procedures, and pleas.  We have conversations in parent meetings, bring speakers in who talk about media use and the education of young and adolescent children, and offer parents books, articles, and more.  But the reality is, we get in our cars and drive home with a GPS on the dash, or a screen that pops down from the roof in the back of the van, or attaches to the seat.  Our kids are on Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr.  So are we.

'Screens' have been prevalent in American public spaces for a long time.  They're at the airport, in restaurants, and in libraries.  They can't be avoided.  Which is why a Waldorf school is a wonderful oasis.  The majority of students today are going to schools that are dominated by screens.  This can begin in preschool.  By grade school, most students are using computers during and after school for their work and for fun.  Technology and screens are used without hesitation in the overwhelming majority of schools.

As a person born in the early 1960's, I remember three channels of TV, an occasional trip to a giant movie screen, and a film strip in class now and then (my favorite days!). I spent my teenage years in England, where TV actually went off the air at night, and morning
 television wasn't instituted until the early 1980's.  In fact, the BBC used to go off the air at the dinner hour so that families could eat undisturbed!

I traveled as an 'untethered' child when I wandered around my neighborhood with my friends after school and on the weekends.  There was no cell phone for parental check-in.  I had freedom to roam, get into trouble, and figure out how to get myself out of trouble.  I had to plan things, such as where to meet people and when.  I couldn't call my mom from the check-out line at Macy's and ask her to meet me by the back door.  What good was all of this inconvenience and freedom?  I built skills in problem-solving and organization.  I developed independence and learned how to use public transport.  I learned how to think things through and plan what I might need later ('Mom, I'll meet you at the front entrance at 3 pm.).  These are valuable skills that children need to develop.  They are just as valuable as developing an inner imagery, which is facilitated by limiting or eliminating 'screen time' for young children. 

'Screen time' is not so simple any more.  It's not just a case of 'turn off the tv'. It's really about technology in general, and so the list to consider is now longer than just tv, movies, and computer time.  It's also worth considering whether your child should have a cell phone and when.  What about an iPod, DS, or e-reader?  What are the benefits of the devices that are available?  What are some of the drawbacks?  There can be interesting discussions about our technology choices and uses.  About why, when, what, and how much. 

It's undeniable that the list of postives regarding technology is long.  My favorite form of internet 'art' is the creation of songs and pictures that are pulled from other sources.  Just do an internet search for The Gregory Brothers and you'll see some things being done with newsclips that couldn't have happened without technology.  So virtual public spaces can be very fun and creative.  This aspect of group creation, of living art, whether it's LOLcats or the Princess Beatrice 'Hat Meme', can be clever and social. 

If you're a parent in a Waldorf school, sometimes the message can seem like all screen time is bad.  I think the conversation is wider than that these days. What types of technology do we have today, and what is appropriate for children and when?  How can we help older kids with technology when they do use it?  What do we, as parents, know about what children are doing with their technology time?  How can we model a healthy 'technology lifestyle', and how can we help children develop one for themselves?

Walking the Path of Childhood When You May Feel Pressured to Run

It's not easy to let our children be children. So often, children are seen as 'mini-adults', as if they are ready for driving their vehicle of life but simply can't reach the pedals. Most parents know that childhood is fleeting and precious, and we try to treat it with reverence and care.

But parents feel pressure, right from the start. What about the birth experience? What about breastfeeding? When did your child sit up? First word? Organic food? Enough food? Childcare? A safe neighborhood? The field of uncertainty is vast.

And then there comes the time for school. Academics are pushed earlier and earlier, despite research that this has many negative effects on children. So, you chose a Waldorf school. If you were able to join in preschool or kindergarten, you learned the value of play, movement, and outdoor time. You knew that out there, in other schools, kindergarteners were sitting at tables and learning how to do bar graphs, or flash cards. And sometimes, you may have had doubts about whether you were doing the right thing. You may have had talks with your teacher, spouse, or friends, about kindergarten and preschool. Ultimately, you saw your child fill up the wide expanse of childhood with exuberance and emotion.

The pressure some parents may feel begins to really take hold in the later grades. Parents may feel fear, anticipation, bewilderment, and anxiety. They may also (we hope!) experience great joy as their middle school student becomes more and more independent, gracious, and capable. If you happen to be the parent of an eighth grader, this is the time of year when you and your student may be experiencing anxiety about high school. Some may begin to feel anxiety about college.

Many parents experience bits and pieces of this anxiety beginning as early as their child's entry into fourth grade. It's easy to be pulled into fear-based thoughts and feelings around our children. Will they be happy, productive, and independent? Will they be kind and giving? Most of us can feel some level of fear as our children gain independence and begin to find their place in the world. But it is as important that our students be allowed to 'be here now', and live as sixth, seventh, or eighth graders, just as they were allowed their kindergarten experience.

Children who are pulled out of their developmental stage and pushed into a later stage are said to be making a withdrawal from the 'bank account' of their future. For example, young children do best when they are not asked to make decisions. Even something simple like 'Do you want to wear the blue coat, or the red coat?', has the effect of pulling the youngster out of today to take a little walk to the future, and make a withdrawal. Decisions are for older children and adults. The result can be that they end up with a very low 'bank' balance when they will need it most: those adolescent and young adult years in which they are meant to be developing independence.

Recently, a preschool class in Kent took a field trip to a college campus to show the children 'where they were headed'. This is an extreme example of the kind of pressure that parents and children are experiencing about the academic future. But there are many other, less-obvious ways that we pull our children out of their childhood on a regular basis, no matter what their age.

So when is the time to think about achievement and success, or college and career? Each family will have their own thoughts on this. It can be helpful for the adults in a child's life to be aware of where their children are developmentally. Children can't and shouldn't be sheltered from everything. What we can do is be aware of our own uncertainties about the future, and recognize them as adult fears. Remember toilet training? Or sleepless nights that seemed endless? You probably had at least one person say, 'Don't worry! Your baby will sleep through the night! Soon, you'll be lucky to get them out of bed by ten am!'.

Although it seems as though there is more and more at stake as children grow up, you have been building a path for them along the way. They will be able to walk down it, and, when they are old enough, they will run.